Wulffmorgenthaler

Há coisas que nunca mudam...

Multi-tasking

Multitasking is the performance by an individual of appearing to handle more than one task at the same time > which can [unfortunatly] be only found in women (and 0,000001% of men)


Referring to this fact, applied to networking, a MEN said:
"Men are half-duplex and women are full-duplex."


For those who won't know...
A half-duplex system provides for communication in both directions, but only one direction at a time (not simultaneously).

A full-duplex, or sometimes double-duplex system allows communication in both directions, and unlike half-duplex, allows this to happen simultaneously.


"Do you hear that, Mr. Anderson? That is the sound of inevitability."

All in one?

Five tips for a woman

1. It is important that a man helps you around the house and has a job.

2. It is important that a man makes you laugh.

3. It is important to find a man you can count on and who doesn't lie to you.

4. It is important that a man loves you and spoils you.

5. It is important that these four men don't know each other

Simple Equation

How To Impress A Woman

Wine her, Dine her, Call her, Hug her, Support her, Hold her, Surprise her, Compliment her, Smile at her, Listen to her, Laugh with her, Cry with her, Romance her, Encourage her, Believe in her, Pray with her, Pray for her, Cuddle with her, Shop with her, Give her jewellery, Buy her flowers, Hold her hand, Write love letters to her, Go to the end of the Earth and back again for her.

How to impress a man:
Show up naked ... Bring chicken wings ... Don't block the TV


The Moods of a Woman...

An angel of truth and a dream of fiction,
A woman is a bundle of contradiction.
She's afraid of a wasp, will scream at a mouse,
But will tackle a stranger alone in the house.
Sour as vinegar, sweet as a rose,
She'll kiss you one minute, then turn up her nose,
She'll win you in rage, enchant you in silk,
She'll be stronger than brandy, milder than milk.
At times she'll be vengeful, merry and sad,
She'll hate you like poison, and love you like mad.

The Moods of a Man....

Hungry.
Horny.
Sleepy

Refund what?

Tech Support

Destino

Não interessa o que acabamos por fazer, interessa sim como la chegamos.

Desemprego

... segundo Quino

Acordar cedo (demais)

O meu último dia em early shift querendo isto dizer que acordo às 5h30... pela última vez nas próximas semanas... Ao que eu só posso acrescentar:

Primo Vere

Tape Dispenser

This made me remind a story I saw on the news one day - a swan who fell in love with a paddle boat - in Germany - (which can be an issue since swans mate for life). She even refused to fly south without her "plastic love".








Story Here

Gente vs Pessoas

Publicidade Enganosa

Mafalda [2]

"Vou fechar a porta (...) so pa ter a oportunidade de ter a felicidade à porta" - Thanks L.
A felicidade pode estar a porta, se assim o quisermos - so depende de nós deixarmos que isso aconteça.

Where do babies come from?

7 year old getting married

Little Bobby (seven) was in love with Little Susie (same age) who lived next door.
One day, Bobby went to Susie's dad and announced (as seriously as he could), "I'm in love with Susie, and we're getting married".

Amused, Susie's dad started asking questions (in the hopes to discourage the idea).
Susie' dad: "Where will you live?"

Bobby: "Well, Susie has a playhouse in the back yard, so we're gonna live there."
Susie's dad: "How are you going to make money to support her?"

Bobby: "Well, Susie gets 75 cents a week, and I get $1.25 a week." "That should be more than enough!"
Seeing that Bobby was still serious, Susie's dad asked, "Well, what about children?"

Bobby perked up and quickly answered, "Oh, we have that figured out already. Whenever Susie lays an egg, I'm gonna stomp on it!"

Nations Of The World

by the Animaniacs

Mafalda [1]

[para ver maior clickar na imagem]